Articles on Marriage

The articles listed on this page are related to the topic of biblical peacemaking in the context of the marriage relationship. Peacemaking Women With personal stories and advice firmly rooted in Scripture, this book offers hope for peace with God, peaceful relationships with others, and genuine peace within. $13.95 more info Hope for Troubled Marriages by Ken Sande, President of Peacemaker Ministries. Do you think that your marriage is beyond hope? In this article, Ken Sande reminds us in this article of the power of God to raise dead marriages to life. How Churches Can Preserve and Heal Marriages by Ken Sande, President of Peacemaker Ministries. Drawn from a chapter Ken Sande wrote for the book Pastoral Leadership for Manhood and Womanhood, this article encourages pastors and layleaders to rescue their people from divorce by exercising loving, restorative church discipline. Love and Respect in Marriage by Ken Sande, President of Peacemaker Ministries. This article is a helpful study of the scriptural principles surrounding the role relationship of husbands and wives. The Myths of Divorce by Ken Sande, President of Peacemaker Ministries. This article discusses five myths that people in the midst of divorce are often fooled into believing. True Stories: Accountable to God When one woman remembered that she was accountable to God, it changed her perspective on her husband and her marriage. Through faithful obedience, she experienced a whole new level of intimacy with God and with her husband. We love to receive letters like this one! True Stories: Church Discipline Saves a Marriage Church discipline often has a negative connotation—harsh, retaliatory, or dictatorial. But church discipline, when...

True Stories: Why Stir up Old Issues?

True Stories: Why Stir up Old Issues? Resolving Everyday Conflict Small group Bible study that’s perfect for use in the church or workplace. Ideal for Sunday school classes, membership classes, mission teams, or neighborhood Bible studies—any group that wants to learn, discuss, and apply the principles of biblical peacemaking together. Church Price: $199.00 more info Our family moved to this church planting situation ready for a new situation and ministry. The boys were ready for a larger high school, my wife was ready for a change, and I was ready for a challenge.The church had been meeting for two years. The congregation was still grieving their former pastor, who had gone to the mission field. I soon learned that this town played hardball when dealing with conflict and that culture affected the churches: the previous year, 25% of the churches had split. And then I heard that the church I was pastoring had started from a church split. Upon investigating, I found that a neighboring church had gone through a severe crisis two and a half years ago. Because of that crisis, four families withdrew and began meeting in a home. They eventually founded the church I was pastoring. Then five months before I came, our church had a split and three of the original four families left. Something in this situation was begging for healing, but where to start? I don’t mind Christians leaving a church because God has led them to another church. But when Christians complain to the community about their former church, the enemy gets an easy victory. I decided this would be our starting point....

True Stories: Where Will Mom Live

True Stories: Where Will Mom Live Guiding People Through Conflict A succinct summary and application of biblical conflict resolution principles for those trying to assist other people who are struggling with conflict. $5.95 more info I was asked to help seven adult brothers and sisters settle a guardianship dispute over whether they should keep their elderly mother in her home or place her in a retirement center. Five of the siblings were doing all they could to escape from the situation, either by pretending that a conflict did not exist or by refusing to meet with the others to talk about it. The other two attacked each other intensely and frequently, slandering one another to family and friends and fighting in court to obtain control through legal guardianship.The first step in resolving the dispute was to help the parties change the way they had been responding to the situation. The five siblings who had been trying to escape from the problem quickly saw the benefits of mediation and agreed to meet together. The other two sisters grudgingly consented to mediation, but they continued to attack each other during our meetings, accusing each other of improper motives and demanding opposing solutions. Our investment of time and energy was producing no results, and relationships were suffering further damage. I finally asked to talk with the two sisters in private to help them discuss the personal offenses that were obviously fueling their quarrel. Putting the guardianship issue aside for a moment, I helped them to examine their attitudes and behavior toward each other. As we studied a few relevant Bible passages, the Lord...

True Stories: When You Need to Negotiate, PAUSE

True Stories: When You Need to Negotiate, PAUSE A “heated” situation The Peacemaker In this foundational peacemaking resource, Ken Sande describes the powerful biblical principles you can use to resolve conflict. Download Chapter 1 for FREE! $13.95 more info Pastor John was barely controlling his anger when he called me for advice. “Someone has to do something!” he said. “My eight-year-old daughter just came home a second time with heat exhaustion after riding in a stifling school van.” When I asked him to explain further, he described a frustrating and challenging conflict.His daughter Cindy and eight other students in their rural community rode in a van to their school that was an hour away. Growing bored with the long ride, some of the children had begun to throw wads of paper and other small items out the windows at passing cars. When motorist complained, the driver was ordered to keep all of the van windows closed, except for the one next to him. By the end of the afternoon drive, the van was so hot that Cindy and some of the other children were coming home with heat exhaustion. Pastor John called the bus company to ask them to allow the windows to be left open. He talked to several people, all of whom refused his request. As his frustration grew, he concluded that he would have to file a lawsuit to force them to respect his daughter’s needs. An example from Daniel After hearing his story, I encouraged him to use a negotiation process based on biblical concepts of valuing relationships and looking out for others’ interests as well as...

True Stories: We Can’t Ever be Close Again

True Stories: We Can’t Ever be Close Again On the brink of divorce The Peacemaker In this foundational peacemaking resource, Ken Sande describes the powerful biblical principles you can use to resolve conflict. Download Chapter 1 for FREE! $13.95 more info Rick could not forgive his wife’s adultery. Even though Pam had given every evidence of repentance and had begged for his forgiveness, the offense stood between them like a towering wall. (Names have been changed.)As a Christian, Rick knew that he should forgive Pam. So to appease his conscience, he told her, “I forgive you, but I can’t ever be close to you again.” His hollow words only increased their hopelessness. Soon divorce seemed to be the only way to end the pain. Empty forgiveness When Rick came to see me a month later and unfolded his story, it was clear that his bitterness was contributing to the destruction of their marriage. His empty “forgiveness” had no power to dispel the memory of Pam’s adultery, which was a dark cloud over their relationship. There was only one genuine way to put the past behind them: true forgiveness—not the meaningless statement that Rick had made to appease his conscience, but the rich, redeeming, thoroughly cleansing forgiveness described in Scripture and modeled by our Lord. To demonstrate to Rick the hypocrisy of his empty statement, I said, “Rick, imagine that you had just confessed a serious sin to God, and that he responded audibly, saying, ‘I forgive you, Rick, but I can’t ever be close to you again.’ How would you feel?” After an awkward pause, he replied, “I guess I’d...